David called me on the 20th of March to inform me he had decided to join the British Army. The previous day he messaged me, telling me he had some “exciting†news to share with me.
His text got me all excited, I had a hunch he was going to tell me has decided to return to Ghana earlier than planned so we could get married.
Not in a million years did I envisage such news. This news to me was devastating and unexpecting and had so many implications; he was not returning to Ghana anytime soon, he wanted to stay permanently in the UK and our plans to get married that year will be put on hold. Here I was thinking my boyfriend will return to his country of birth, find himself a job, we will then get married and will live happily ever after! That was the plan both of us have been talking about for years.
Why the sudden change of plan I wondered? This news really unsettled me, I became speechless and did not know what to say to him.
David and I started dating when he was in his final year at the University of Ghana, studying Computer Science, whilst I was studying linguistics and English and in my second year. It was not love at first sight! We were both in a taxi queue waiting to go to the town centre, he offered I take his place instead as he was not in a hurry, because he overheard me saying to a friend I needed to get to town quickly and be back in time for a lecture. I gladly accepted his offer and thanked him.
A month later we bumped into each other at the library, we briefly said hello and exchanged phone numbers. That’s how our friendship started. We became friends and a few weeks later, he asked me out on a date.
It was my first proper date, he took me to a very posh restaurant near campus. Everything was perfect that evening. The ambiance was excellent, and the food was delicious. At the end of the evening he walked me back to my hostel, when we got to my door, he planted a kiss on my cheek and whispered I love you. I found the whole experience a bit strange! He then said goodnight and walked away. The following day, he messaged me to say he really meant what he said and wanted us to start dating. I told him I had to think about his proposal.
Prior to that, I have had two separate proposals which I had already turned down, so I needed a very good reason to turn down his proposal. I liked David very much as a friend, but I was not sure if I wanted him to be my boyfriend. The following weeks I avoided him because I was confused, I did not want to lose a good friend without hurting his feelings. For three weeks I ignored his phone calls and text messages.
On Valentine's day, I decided to escape all the Valentine celebration activities happening on campus and go to the library in the evening, who needs to celebrate valentine’s day when you have a quiz the following day! Around 9 pm, I was exhausted, I left the library for my hostel. I then decided to visit some friends in my flat, but unsurprisingly all of them were out celebrating valentine’s day! It looked, everyone, was out celebrating except me! So, I headed to my room to sleep.
When I opened my door and turned the lights on, there stood David in the middle of my room with a bunch of red roses, with petals spread all over the floor with a hand-written card, with the inscription “please be my girlfriend†I just blurted out how did you get into my room? Later I got to know my roommate was in with his plan. Here I was face to face with a guy in my room who had done the most romantic thing for me, asking me to be his girlfriend.
He handed me a box of chocolate, my favourite perfume a beautiful card and a handwritten letter professing his love for me. I accepted his proposal and from that moment we officially started dating. After David graduated he decided to go to the UK and work for some time and then return for us to get married, by that time, I would have also completed my degree and be gainfully employed.
Then unexpectedly he calls to inform me he wants to join the British Army! It is 2016 I have completed my university degree landed a well-paid job in a top bank in Ghana, waiting for my prince charming to return home, and he is now telling me he wants to stay there forever! When I found my voice, I told him I wanted to stay in Ghana and not migrate to the UK.
He suggested we break up since he wants to stay permanently in England. I was dumbfounded by his comment. He further said he cannot continue with our long-distance relationship if am not willing to join him. My mind began to race to think of all sorts of reasons why he wants us to break up after dating for years. In the past, he always used to assure me distance had no power over our relationship. When I found my voice, I suggested we both have a rethink of our stands regarding the issue and have another discussion later when both of us are less emotional and upset.
The following week, at work a prospective customer from the UK walked into my office wanting to open an account with my firm. We got chatting, she revealed to me she was getting married soon, out of excitement she began to show me pictures of her chosen wedding gown on her phone. Whilst going through the photos on her phone I saw David’s picture, the first instinct that came to my mind was that they might be friends, she then pointed out to me, that was her fiancé! I was beyond shocked, my face dropped, she noticed it and asked if I knew him.
Then I said he was a spitting image of a course mate at the university who had died two years ago. I don’t even know how that reason came into my mind! My heart was pounding; my hands became sweaty; my legs were shaking. She noticed I was shocked but apologized for showing me a picture that has brought sad memories to me, only if she knew the truth! Fortunately, we had finished opening the account, so quickly composed myself and wished her well and ushered her out of my office. I must admit she was a beautiful and lovely lady.
Later, that day I texted David to informed him I wanted to stay in Ghana because my whole family is in Ghana not forgetting my friends, plus I have secured and a good paying job. To end my text, I wrote PS. I met your fiancée Lucy today in my office. She is such a nice and warm person. All the best for the future.
A year later, I met my husband through my manager at work, she thought we will be a perfect couple. Today, we have been married for 3 years and blessed with two children. As for David, we are not in contact anymore, we are however still friends on Facebook. From his Facebook profile, I gather he is married with a son. I hope he is happy because he looks happy in his photos.!